A Merry Casketty Christmas
by ucsbdad
Summary: Just a quick look at Christmas Future with our favorite couple.


A Merry Casketty Christmas

By UCSBdad

Disclaimer: I don't own Castle or Walt Kelly. Rating: K Time: Duh! Christmas time.

All was relatively quiet on Christmas Eve in the Castle household. Cookies and milk were set out for Santa, and Scotch and turkey sandwiches for the adults. In the background, Rick Castle's favorite Christmas carol played softly:

_Deck us all with Boston Charlie,  
Walla Walla, Wash., an' Kalamazoo!  
Nora's freezin' on the trolley,  
Swaller dollar cauliflower alley-garoo!_

_Don't we know archaic barrel  
Lullaby Lilla Boy, Louisville Lou?  
Trolley Molly don't love Harold,  
Boola boola Pensacoola hullabaloo!_

_Bark us all bow-wows of folly,  
Polly wolly cracker 'n' too-da-loo!  
Donkey Bonny brays a carol,  
Antelope Cantaloupe, 'lope with you!_

_Hunky Dory's pop is lolly,  
Gaggin' on the wagon, Willy, folly go through!  
Chollie's collie barks at Barrow,  
Harum scarum five alarm bung-a-loo!_

_Dunk us all in bowls of barley,  
Hinky dinky dink an' polly voo!  
Chilly Filly's name is Chollie,  
Chollie Filly's jolly chilly view halloo!_

_Bark us all bow-wows of folly,  
Double-bubble, toyland trouble! Woof, woof, woof!  
Tizzy seas on melon collie!  
Dibble-dabble, scribble-scrabble! Goof, goof, goof!_

"Where's part 16D?"

Kate furrowed her brow and looked as serious as she could. "Between part 16C and 16E?"

"I can't imagine how I could have missed that." Castle continued to search around among the parts scattered around on the floor. "Aha! Here it is." He picked up the part and put together another sub-assembly.

"I really never thought I'd be doing this again."

'What? Going completely overboard at Christmas? I thought by now we'd have made at least one trip to the North Pole to find Santa." She teased.

"That's a great idea. I bet that if we looked very hard…"

"We'd freeze solid." Kate finished for him. "And given the way the arctic ice is melting, I don't think a trip up there is a good idea."

Castle sighed dramatically. "And there goes my oh, so practical wife, bringing reality in to spoil my dreams."

"I'll see if I can do something for your dreams later tonight." She said softly.

He winked at her. "What I meant was that I never thought I'd be assembling Santa's gifts on Christmas Eve again. I thought Alexis was it for me. And after Kyra, Meredith and Gina, I never thought I'd ever find someone that I'd want to spend my life with, but here I am, putting together a Millennium Falcon with my wife for my children. I really never thought I'd be doing that."

"So says the man with a life sized Bobba Fett in the bathroom. Are you sure you bought the giant economy sized Millennium Falcon for the kids, or for yourself?"

"For the kids, of course. That's not to say that I can't help them play with it." He stopped for a moment. "Speaking of Bobba Fett, I noticed he was wearing a lacy black brassiere the other night. Would you know anything about that?"

Kate assumed a look of extreme innocence. "No, but I'll talk to Lily about it."

"Excuse me if I'm wrong, but I wasn't aware that Lily was in need of a bra. Am I missing something?"

"I'm sure she doesn't need one, now that you mention it." Kate said, looking very thoughtful. "And I suppose that lets out Jake and Reece."

"That leaves us with…"

"Alexis?" Kate said.

"Hasn't been here since Thanksgiving."

"Martha?"

"In LA for the last two months on that TV series."

Kate looked very, very serious. "That only leaves one possibility."

"I agree,"

"Bobba Fett put on one of my bras."

Castle rolled his eyes and shook his head. "And why would Bobba Fett, the most dangerous bounty hunter in the entire galaxy, put on a bra?"

"Duh! Bobba Fett is a woman."

Castle clutched at his heart as his face assumed a look of great pain. "Bobba Fett, a woman? That's not possible. Bobba Fett is a man. Everyone knows that."

"Oh, and how do we know that?"

"He looks like a man."

"How does anyone know what she looks like? She never took off her helmet."

"Okay, his body looks like a man's."

"She's encased in all that armor. We have no idea what she'd look like with all that armor off of her."

He shook his head vigorously. "It just stands to reason that Bobba Fett is a man."

"Are you saying that a woman can't be a dangerous, ass kicking bounty hunter?"

Castle knew he'd gone too far." Well, no. There's no reason that someone like Bobba Fett couldn't be a woman, but in all of the movies and whatnot he's been voiced by a man."

"And Hollywood is quite happy to use male stunt men to double for women. Just because some sexist Hollywood suit used a male voice actor doesn't mean Bobba isn't a woman. In fact, I think she's a lady. I think she has a tragic past that led her to bounty hunting."

"And very expensive taste in brassieres." Castle muttered under his breath.

"What was that?' Kate asked sweetly.

"I said she has expensive taste in brassieres."

"I'm glad we agree on that."

Another of Rick's favorite carols began playing. He started to sing along:

_Good King Sauerkraut, look out your feets uneven,_

_As the snoo lay all about, all kerchoo achievin'. _

Kate looked puzzled. "Castle, what's snoo?"

"Not much, Beckett. What's new with you?"

Kate groaned.

"Gotcha." Castle said happily.

Kate looked over the toy that Castle was putting together. "I see a continuity problem. Princess Leia never wore her slave girl costume while she was on the Millennium Falcon. You got the wrong doll."

"Doll! You're calling an action figure a doll? These are nothing like dolls! They're specially made _action_ figures."

"Okay, the action figure of Princess Leia is wrong. She never wore the skimpy slave girl outfit in the Millennium Falcon."

"It's not Princess Leia." Rick announced with a smile.

"Who is it, then?"

"Princess Mommy."

Kate picked up the action figure. "That's my face and my body."

"It's all anatomically correct."

"What?" Kate raised the figure's skirt. "That's my ass." She glared at Rick.

"And a perfect ass it is."

"I'm going to glue the skirt down tomorrow." She picked up another figure. "And who is this?"

"Daddy Solo, of course."

"Daddy is no longer solo. He'd better remember he's spoken for."

"For which he is thankful every day."

"And this one?" She held up a robed figure.

"Kevin-wan Kenobi."

She shook her head. "And him?"

"Ah! Javibacca, the Wookie."

She held up two more figures. "And the two redheaded droids?"

"Alexis D2 and Grams PO. Who else?"

"And the one all in black?"

"Darth Gates."

Kate shook her head. "I hope none of our friends ever see them."

"What do you mean? I had to have a set made for Ryan's kids and one of Javibacca for Espo."

"You know what you're missing, don't you?"

"I know. Kate Fett and when you take her helmet off, it turns out she's gorgeous Princess Mommy's twin sister."

"And not anatomically correct."

Rick went back to assembling the toy.

"I never thought I'd ever do this, either." She said softly.

"I'm glad I could get you to enjoy Christmas again.'

'It's not just Christmas. I knew, I just absolutely knew, that I'd never find a man who'd love me and I'd love him, and we'd have children and I'd have a grown-up daughter who calls me mom, and a woman who's a mother to me. I was entrenched behind my walls and I knew no one was ever going to break down those walls. Until you came along."

"Always glad to help someone enjoy Christmas."

"It just isn't me, you know. For years my dad would spend Christmas all alone at our cabin. But now he's spending Christmas with his family."

"Being a grandpa has certain obligations, which he fulfills perfectly. I'm glad he's found Christmas, too."

"I do just love Christmas with all of you."

"And all of the presents from Santa?"

Kate laughed. "You know, I do know that you and Alexis and Martha bought all those presents that are to Kate from Santa."

"Since you grew up not believing in Santa, it's the least I could do."

"What do you mean, I grew up not believing in Santa?"

"You told me that when you were three you decided there was no Santa because your apartment had no chimney."

"Castle, you are _so_ easy." She said with a laugh. "Of course, I believed in Santa as a little girl. I was six when I heard some older kids saying there was no Santa, that it was your parents. When I went home, I asked my mother and she told me there was no Santa Claus, and no Easter Bunny and no Tooth Fairy, either. I was crushed. I cried all day."

"And here I've had this vision of Little Katie Beckett sitting in kindergarten, having a bologna sandwich from her My Little Pony lunchbox…"

"Please. I had a Wonder Woman lunch box."

"Of course, you did. But I imagined you sitting there hearing about how the other children got wonderful presents from Santa and feeling bad because you'd never get presents from Santa because you knew he didn't exist. I felt awful for you, and now I find you did believe in Santa."

"And I still do. I believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny _and_ the Tooth Fairy. And I know they're real."

Castle frowned. "How?"

"Just look at the presents I get from him, silly."

"That makes perfect sense, somehow."

"Thank you for waiting for me to stop living behind my damned walls. I know I put you through a lot and I appreciate it more than I can ever tell you. Sometimes I really can't believe you put up with me for all those years. Thank you." She leaned over and kissed him. "Were it worth the trouble, Pilgrim?"

"Eh. What trouble?"

The End

And

Merry Christmas

Happy Hanukkah

Happy Kwanza

Happy Anything Else

**Author's note: Next up will be The Pilot. A pilot lands his damaged fighter on a devastated and unknown planet. Perhaps he can fix his ship if he can find a local to help.**


End file.
